Hi all Its Friday Giggle time
The Wife
A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office.
After his check up, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don't follow my instructions carefully, your husband will surely die.
"Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him.
"Don't burden him with chores. Don't discuss your problems with him; it will only make his stress worse. Do not nag him. Most importantly, make love to him regularly.
"If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."
On the way home, the husband asked his wife, "What did the doctor say?"
"He said you're going to die," she replied.
Have a great week end
Regards
Tim
P D Motors (Billingshurst) Limited
Unit E4 Gillmans Ind Est
Natts lane
Billingshurst
West Sussex
RH14 9EZ
Tel 01403 786211
FaX 01403 780546
Email tim.clarke@pdmotors.co.uk
Web www.pdmotors.co.uk
This email is intended only for the addressee named above and the contents should not be disclosed to any other person nor copies taken. Any views or opinions presented are solely those of the sender and do not necessarily represent those of P D Motors (Billingshurst) Ltd unless otherwise specifically stated. As internet communications are not secure we do not accept legal responsibility for the contents of this message, nor responsibility for any change made to the message after it was sent by the original sender. We advise you to carry out your own virus check before opening any attachments as we cannot accept liability for any damage sustained as a result of any software viruses.
Friday, 29 January 2010
Friday, 22 January 2010
फ्रिदय giggle
Friday Giggle
I thought you would want to know about this e-mail virus. Even the most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one.
It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.
Symptoms:
1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. done that!
2.. Causes you to send a blank e-mail that too!
3.. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. yep!
4.. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you. Aha!
5.. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. well darn!
6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished. Oh, no - not again!
7. Causes you to hit "DELETE" instead of "SEND." and I just hate that!
8.. Causes you to hit "SEND" when you should "DELETE." Oh No!
IT IS CALLED THE
"C-NILE VIRUS."
Hmmm....Have I already sent this to you?
Ps
If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours
Regards
Tim
I thought you would want to know about this e-mail virus. Even the most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one.
It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.
Symptoms:
1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice. done that!
2.. Causes you to send a blank e-mail that too!
3.. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person. yep!
4.. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you. Aha!
5.. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment. well darn!
6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished. Oh, no - not again!
7. Causes you to hit "DELETE" instead of "SEND." and I just hate that!
8.. Causes you to hit "SEND" when you should "DELETE." Oh No!
IT IS CALLED THE
"C-NILE VIRUS."
Hmmm....Have I already sent this to you?
Ps
If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours
Regards
Tim
Friday, 15 January 2010
फ्रिदय Giggle
Hi All
With all the negatives around this week my Friday Giggle is very important
enjoy
A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the
hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death
experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you
have another 43 years, two months and eight days to live." Upon
recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift,
liposuction and tummy tuck. Since she had so much more time to live, she
figured she might as well look even nicer. After her last operation, she
was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way
home, an ambulance killed her. Arriving in front of God, she demanded,
"I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me out of
the path of that ambulance?" God replied, "Girl, I didn't recognize you”
Have a great weekend
Regards
Tim
P D Motors (Billingshurst) Limited
Unit E4 Gillmans Ind Est
Natts lane
Billingshurst
West Sussex
RH14 9EZ
Tel 01403 786211
FaX 01403 780546
Email tim.clarke@pdmotors.co.uk
Web www.pdmotors.co.uk
With all the negatives around this week my Friday Giggle is very important
enjoy
A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the
hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death
experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you
have another 43 years, two months and eight days to live." Upon
recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift,
liposuction and tummy tuck. Since she had so much more time to live, she
figured she might as well look even nicer. After her last operation, she
was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way
home, an ambulance killed her. Arriving in front of God, she demanded,
"I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me out of
the path of that ambulance?" God replied, "Girl, I didn't recognize you”
Have a great weekend
Regards
Tim
P D Motors (Billingshurst) Limited
Unit E4 Gillmans Ind Est
Natts lane
Billingshurst
West Sussex
RH14 9EZ
Tel 01403 786211
FaX 01403 780546
Email tim.clarke@pdmotors.co.uk
Web www.pdmotors.co.uk
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Follow The Tips and Extend the Life of Your Car
Buying a car usually involves years of car payments, and it is only natural that as a new car owner you will want to protect your investment and extent the life of your car. My first tip to extend your car’s life involves the proper care giver.
Since most people don’t have the time or knowledge to maintain their own vehicles, it makes sense to look for a mechanic you trust. I may be a bit biased, but I do feel that the best place to have work done on a new vehicle (especially one still under warranty) is at a locla independant garage.
Look for a reputable garage that works on the type of car you own and check his references with his clients and other people you trust. Once you find that garage, the best thing you can do is have your car serviced by him on a routine basis. All car manufacturers have a schedule of recommended service for each vehicle they sell.
Keep your car nicely tuned and toned by following your car’s maintenance schedule. For instance, make sure you regularly change your oil, tyres, brakes, filters, spark plugs and fluids. Regular maintenance to your car can prevent most major wear and tear problems, saving you money. Some other things to do regularly are: rotate tyres and keep them properly inflated, and make sure your front end is aligned properly(tracking).
Make sure you stay on your vehicle’s maintenance schedule.
Use common sense. If you hear, see or smell something unusual while driving, get your car checked out. The sooner a mechanic diagnosis and fixes your problem the less money you will ultimately spend to fix your car. Accelerate slowly both to save fuel and preserve the life of your car, and finally wash your car and keep it neat and clean. If possible park your car in a garage or under some kind of roof. If that is not possible, buy a water repellent cover and use it even on sunny days…
Since most people don’t have the time or knowledge to maintain their own vehicles, it makes sense to look for a mechanic you trust. I may be a bit biased, but I do feel that the best place to have work done on a new vehicle (especially one still under warranty) is at a locla independant garage.
Look for a reputable garage that works on the type of car you own and check his references with his clients and other people you trust. Once you find that garage, the best thing you can do is have your car serviced by him on a routine basis. All car manufacturers have a schedule of recommended service for each vehicle they sell.
Keep your car nicely tuned and toned by following your car’s maintenance schedule. For instance, make sure you regularly change your oil, tyres, brakes, filters, spark plugs and fluids. Regular maintenance to your car can prevent most major wear and tear problems, saving you money. Some other things to do regularly are: rotate tyres and keep them properly inflated, and make sure your front end is aligned properly(tracking).
Make sure you stay on your vehicle’s maintenance schedule.
Use common sense. If you hear, see or smell something unusual while driving, get your car checked out. The sooner a mechanic diagnosis and fixes your problem the less money you will ultimately spend to fix your car. Accelerate slowly both to save fuel and preserve the life of your car, and finally wash your car and keep it neat and clean. If possible park your car in a garage or under some kind of roof. If that is not possible, buy a water repellent cover and use it even on sunny days…
Safe Driving Tips to New Drivers
By going over these common sense driving tips with your young drivers, you can protect your investment and extent the life of your car, as well as ease your mind about keeping your child as safe as possible.
Lights: Before driving a car make sure all the lights are working by walking around the car. Turn on your blinkers and make sure they work. Always drive with your headlights on for better visibility.
Leaks: Look for any fluid leaks or things hanging from the vehicle. Check your fuel level.
Tyres: Check that the tires are properly inflated.
Seatbelts: Always put on your seat belt and make sure all passengers are wearing seat belts.
Mirrors: Adjust all three mirrors before you start the car to reduce your blind spots. When driving, check behind you every 6-8 seconds.
STOPS: At stop signs and red lights come to a stop then count to 5. Look left, right, straight ahead then left again before proceeding. Keep an eye out for anyone who might run the stop sign or light.
Trucks: Be especially wary when driving behind or passing trucks because they have a large blind spot.
Never Tailgate.
Weather: Drive slowly when it is raining or foggy. Drive even slower when it is snowing. Don’t drive at all if it is icy.
In General: Never drive tired. Leave early and do not speed. Stay alert and be ready when other drivers to make mistakes. Do not talk on your cell phone or text on your cell phone. Make sure someone knows where you are going and when you are supposed to arrive. Put a card in your dash containing contact numbers, emergency contact information, and any medical needs you may have.
These simple steps will not only prolong the life of your car, they will help to keep your child safe on the roads
Lights: Before driving a car make sure all the lights are working by walking around the car. Turn on your blinkers and make sure they work. Always drive with your headlights on for better visibility.
Leaks: Look for any fluid leaks or things hanging from the vehicle. Check your fuel level.
Tyres: Check that the tires are properly inflated.
Seatbelts: Always put on your seat belt and make sure all passengers are wearing seat belts.
Mirrors: Adjust all three mirrors before you start the car to reduce your blind spots. When driving, check behind you every 6-8 seconds.
STOPS: At stop signs and red lights come to a stop then count to 5. Look left, right, straight ahead then left again before proceeding. Keep an eye out for anyone who might run the stop sign or light.
Trucks: Be especially wary when driving behind or passing trucks because they have a large blind spot.
Never Tailgate.
Weather: Drive slowly when it is raining or foggy. Drive even slower when it is snowing. Don’t drive at all if it is icy.
In General: Never drive tired. Leave early and do not speed. Stay alert and be ready when other drivers to make mistakes. Do not talk on your cell phone or text on your cell phone. Make sure someone knows where you are going and when you are supposed to arrive. Put a card in your dash containing contact numbers, emergency contact information, and any medical needs you may have.
These simple steps will not only prolong the life of your car, they will help to keep your child safe on the roads
Tuesday, 12 January 2010
I’ve put together a helpful list of what I believe are the top five worst driving habits. You’ve probably all witnessed (or possibly committed) these minor driving mistakes, but I hope you find these helpful. And remember, many of these bad habits can be prevented by practicing defensive driving or using common sense. I hope you enjoy this list, and please remember to stay safe on the road.
Drinking and driving. Unless you have a death wish, don’t drink and drive. Consuming alcohol before driving a vehicle is suicidal behavior. Always make sure that you have a designated driver or place to stay for the night if you plan on drinking. Drinking and driving puts you and all other drivers in your path at risk. Just don’t do it.
Speeding. Driving at high speeds can drastically reduce reaction time—that is, you may not have enough time to prevent an accident from happening, even if you see it coming. Remember to always observe speed limits and factor in your driving conditions, especially rain, traffic, and snow. A car crash at 80 miles per hour is twice as bad as one at 55 miles per hour. By slowing down, you create a safer environment for the rest of us and arrive at your destination in one piece.
Tailgating. You are not a Formular 1 driver. You are not driving on a Grand prix racetrack—you are driving on the highway. Everybody’s got to get somewhere fast and we know you do too, but put some space between your car and other drivers. You never know when the car in front of you is going to slam on their brakes. Maintain a safe driving distance and prevent an accident.
Not wearing your seat belt. Choosing not to wear a seat belt is highly dangerous. Think of it this way: a car crash at the low speed of 30 miles per hour (without a seat belt) is similar to falling off of a three-story building. Protect yourself in all minor (and major) accidents. Take the two extra seconds before you start your car and buckle up—you’ll be thankful you did.
Not paying attention. Check your mirrors for blind spots, look out for pot holes, stalled cars, objects in the road, or any other obstacles. Don’t apply makeup, shave your legs, text, fiddle with your iPod, or talk on the phone while driving. Put your safety first. Look at the traffic around you. Be observant and aware of your surroundings and you’ll easily avoid any accidents that come your way.
Drinking and driving. Unless you have a death wish, don’t drink and drive. Consuming alcohol before driving a vehicle is suicidal behavior. Always make sure that you have a designated driver or place to stay for the night if you plan on drinking. Drinking and driving puts you and all other drivers in your path at risk. Just don’t do it.
Speeding. Driving at high speeds can drastically reduce reaction time—that is, you may not have enough time to prevent an accident from happening, even if you see it coming. Remember to always observe speed limits and factor in your driving conditions, especially rain, traffic, and snow. A car crash at 80 miles per hour is twice as bad as one at 55 miles per hour. By slowing down, you create a safer environment for the rest of us and arrive at your destination in one piece.
Tailgating. You are not a Formular 1 driver. You are not driving on a Grand prix racetrack—you are driving on the highway. Everybody’s got to get somewhere fast and we know you do too, but put some space between your car and other drivers. You never know when the car in front of you is going to slam on their brakes. Maintain a safe driving distance and prevent an accident.
Not wearing your seat belt. Choosing not to wear a seat belt is highly dangerous. Think of it this way: a car crash at the low speed of 30 miles per hour (without a seat belt) is similar to falling off of a three-story building. Protect yourself in all minor (and major) accidents. Take the two extra seconds before you start your car and buckle up—you’ll be thankful you did.
Not paying attention. Check your mirrors for blind spots, look out for pot holes, stalled cars, objects in the road, or any other obstacles. Don’t apply makeup, shave your legs, text, fiddle with your iPod, or talk on the phone while driving. Put your safety first. Look at the traffic around you. Be observant and aware of your surroundings and you’ll easily avoid any accidents that come your way.
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